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I was very unwell for 8 months last year. I lost the ability to do simple things. The white page was a tundra of doubt for me, one I was afraid to make a mark on. Forms became endlessly complex; I put them off for months. All I wanted to do was sleep. I wanted to hibernate from humanity and wake up again one day when my worries had evaporated.
The logic of depression is brutal and circular. You feel terrible but are convinced you deserve to feel terrible because you are such a worthless person. To break that cycle I needed to go beyond the kind advice of friends and family. Before I tried therapy I was convinced that it was something that worked only for neurotic New Yorkers in Woody Allen films and the kind of navel-gazing hippies that make me want to throw myself into the ocean.
Medication can certainly save some people but all it did for me was provoke vomiting and stomach cramps.
Therapy has freed me from the gloom that threatened to envelop me. Accessibility links Skip to article Skip to navigation. Wednesday 19 September I'm in therapy — and I'm not ashamed to admit it Seeking professional help for personal problems should carry no taboo whatsoever, writes Mic Wright. I have been since January this year. I will be forever. This is referred to as Transference.
I'm In Love With My Therapist
Transference means that feelings and events from the past, particularly those that were unresolved, are relived with new people in the present. We "transfer" the feelings and meanings we experienced, particularly with our parents, to an important person in the present. Many people are embarrassed to discuss their sexual and romantic feelings toward their therapist because they believe that these thoughts and feelings are "inappropriate.
As Freud pointed out a very long time ago, he was never so handsome that he should be adored and desired by his patients. In other words, he knew he was dealing with transference.
Actually, the feelings and beliefs connected with love of the therapist have a lot to do with doubts we have about our selves. Knowing it is inappropriate to have sexual feelings towards the therapist really means that we believe that we are not loveable. We are convinced that if we were loveable the therapist would make love to us, the patient.
So, you see, the problem is not that the therapist does not love us, the patient; but that we feel unlovable and always feared that we were not loved by our parents.
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Ultimately, the solution is to end our self hate and find an appropriate partner in the world outside of therapy. Then, too, the sexual feelings harbored toward the therapist can mask or cover hateful feelings.
What better way to destroy a therapist than to lure the practitioner into a sexual liaison? The bottom line is that it is important to talk about and understand these feelings and thoughts within the safety of psychotherapy. Finding the right partner in the outside world is part of what defines Adulthood. For those seeking addiction treatment for themselves or a loved one, the MentalHelp.